Pregnancy and Motherhood...

I am now 7 1/2 months pregnant, a very much obvious pregnant woman. At least now, at the first glance, people already recognizes that I am actually pregnant and not a person who just came from a buffet. I just read my post on being fat and pregnant. A post that I wrote when I was only on my 3rd month. This post got 660 page views to-date from different parts of the world. This is really a surprise to me since I never even posted this in my facebook account. People just searched fat pregnant people, obese and pregnant etc. so I guess there are a lot of people around the globe going through the same experience as I am. My pregnancy and my experience is not unique. I am not alone.

Anyway at that time, my main concern is what people think about me and how they react to my changing body. I was too sensitive back then because I was still adjusting to all changes that are happening in my body.

Now that I am on my last trimester, yes I may still have some episodes wherein I get conscious of myself, but I think my main concern now is accepting and embracing the new chapter of my life – motherhood. In a few months, our baby Giulia Bernice will be born. I actually have mixed emotions and tons of questions on Giulia’s coming.

Will I miss the feeling of being pregnant? Will I miss Giulia’s kicks and movements in my tummy? When will I give birth? How long and painful will my labor be? Will I be able to perform all my duties when Giulia comes? And of course, my ultimate question… will I be a good mother to Giulia? Will I be able to give her the best?

These are just some of my questions… believe me I still have a lot.. but I guess these questions are just normal for a new mom-to-be like me.

Will I miss the feeling of being pregnant? Will I miss Giulia’s kicks and movements in my tummy? For the all day sickness – nausea, vomiting and headache – of course not! I am so happy that I just had to suffer that for my first 3 months. But I will definitely miss Giulia’s kicks and movements inside my tummy. It maybe sometimes uncomfortable but  I find it so magical. It gave me a sense of responsibility to take extra care of myself because I know our baby is dependent on me.

When will I give birth? How long and painful will my labor be? I am due on December 31 but that is already my 40th week. So I am hoping to give birth a few days earlier or even earlier than Christmas. I do not want to pop and contribute literally to the big bang for the coming New Year.
Also, I do not want to be in the news for having a baby at midnight of the first day of the year. With regards to labor and pain management, my husband and I attended a birth class. This is a birth class being taught by Ms. Chiqui Brosas-Hahn, an expert on Lamaze and Bradley method. It taught us relaxation techniques, massages, breathing exercises that will help me during labor. So even though I still do not know how long will my labor be, at least somehow, I know what to expect and what to do when the time comes.

Will I be able to perform all my duties when Giulia comes? I am currently employed in a semiconductor company, a fast-paced industry where products are being developed everyday and shapes the new wave of technology and innovation. I do not plan to stop working when Giulia comes. I just have to find time to juggle my responsibilities of being an employee, a wife, a daughter, a friend and soon-to-be mother. 

Will I be a good mother to Giulia? I believe God gave every woman the maternal instincts. Maternal instincts as per Elyse Rubenstein, a Philadelphia psychiatrist who counsels new mothers, the term refers to "an inborn tendency to want to protect and nurture one's offspring. Also, I am confident that through the help of my family, loved ones and friends, Gerard and I will be able to raise Giulia well.

Will I be able to give Giulia the best? Of course, I want nothing but the best for our precious angel. I have attended several baby workshops, lectures and classes. They all talked about one way on how to give the best to our babies and this is through breastfeeding. They say that breast is best. Allow me to share some parts from a speech of a dear friend – Bianca Atienza Gutierrez, a breastfeeding advocate and a soon-to-be certified lactation counselor with LATCH.
           
Breastfeeding is tough. It is time-consuming, at times uncomfortable and tiring. It is an act of complete self-sacrifice, almost as if dying to oneself for the benefit of this little angel that was crafted for us by God Himself. It is a spiritual act. It is a prayer of thanks to the Lord for the gift of a child. It is an outpouring of pure love, an exclusive experience only mothers can share.

Her speech really pierced my heart and made me more inspired to breastfeed. Also through her, I learned that there is a patroness for mothers and mothers-to-be. Our Lady of La Leche, Nuestra Senora de La Leche Y Buen Parto (Our Lady of Milk and Safe Delivery). I am so blessed to have known her. I may not have tried breastfeeding but at least through Mama Mary’s intercession, I will have the confidence to give the best to Giulia.

I am on my third trimester and as they say… the homestretch! I am feeling a combination of excitement as Giulia’s birth approaches, mixed with an increasing desire to hurry things along. I know I will still have more questions and more concerns as my due date draws near. But I also do know that I have God, my family and relatives, my friends and of course, my wonderful husband to help me go through this new chapter of my life.

Gerard and I just cannot wait to see our precious little angel – a wonderful addition to our family. 

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