On being the best Mom

I am a working mom. All my life, I have an 8-5 (or actually sometimes 7-6 PM)
job every weekdays. My kids now are aged 8 and 6. Since both are already in school, I just have time to help them in their school work when I go home from work. During weekends, we go to the malls and eat outside as our way to bond with our kids. My kids look forward to weekends since there's no school nor work.

When I look at social media and see the stay-at-home moms with children being with them 24/7. I sometimes feel guilty. They get to cook food or prepare their "baon" or snack for school. They have time to bring their school to children then they have more time to guide and teach them after school.

Now that there is a pandemic, like most people are, I have been at home since March. I am working from home and I can say I now have time with my children. Now I see in social media, the used-to-be working moms are now able to do the things that they wished they will be able to do for their children before. Most of the moms turned to chefs/bakers and they are able to serve their kids nutritious food. 

Some moms now were able to do crafting or they do the laundry and clean/arrange stuff at home. 

I am not one of them.

Occasionally, I bake or cook something for my kids. But just simple things since I am not very good in cooking. The only thing I can do is mixing, baking and frying. So my cooking skills is just limited to frying eggs, pancakes, bacon etc. I can just do homemade ice cream wherein it only involves mixing ingredients and putting it in the freezer. 

I also do not eat vegetables and not fond of eating fruits. 

Given all this, does this mean I am failing as a mom?

I came across an article yesterday and it answered my questions...

housekeeping is not motherhood

I will just share some snippets from the article and if you want to read the full article, you can just search in Google.
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Domesticity does not equal motherhood. ⁣

Your “success” as a mother is not defined by domestic duties. Domestic duties are part of being an adult.⁣
⁣
While your children do need to be changed and fed, that’s not the summation of MOTHERHOOD. Anyone can change and feed children, including dads. You can hire someone to clean your house and feed your kids, and you’ll still be a mom. ⁣

You are a good mom because you love your child, and you try to help them learn the things they need to learn. You worry about your kids, you spend time with them, you plan for their future, and so much more.⁣
⁣
You might be terrible at domestic duties (I don’t know) or you might be the best housekeeper in the world. But neither end of the spectrum — or anything in between — determines if you’re a good mom or not.⁣
⁣
Housekeeping is NOT motherhood.⁣
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This made me feel better. 

I may not be able to cook nutritious food for my kids, but I am thankful that I have a mother-in-law who is very generous and gives healthy food such as vegetables and fruits to my children.

I am thankful that we have helpers who do laundry and clean our house.

This made me realize that just because I am not the typical mom, I am not the best mom for my children. As long as I show them I love them, make time for them, play with them, help them in school, teach them to be good, I can be the best mom. Being the best mom is a continuous and evolving process. We can make mistakes and it is ok. Afterall, motherhood does not come with an operating manual. 

We can fail at times but we can rise again and be stronger. This should not stop us in becoming good, then better then best moms for our children.















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